Category Archives: Writing

Take Out The Trash

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Taking out the trash—my least favorite chore for so many reasons. I used to think it was because that was my late husband’s job and I tried to rationalize all the emotional reasons as to why I hated it. But I’ve come to understand I just despise taking out the trash. I know it’s ridiculous and from my kitchen to the garage is a whole ten steps and from the garage to the side of the street is maybe an additional ten steps but I still don’t like it.

This week especially my load for the poor garbage guys is huge! Between getting my house painted (no more white walls for this girl!) and with the house already in disarray I’ve tackled the HUGE chore of cleaning out and de-cluttering the house.

As I sat drinking my morning coffee thinking about how I don’t want to take out the trash for the billionth time this week I had a thought. (Scary I know.) So here I sit at my laptop procrastinating by writing this blog post because there’s a guest room closet packed to the brim with memories, keepsakes, and junk I MUST clean up today which will also create at least two more bags of trash to take out.

Taking out the trash is something we have to do from time to time within our lives—not only the physical act but also the emotional act. Between the amount of garbage and useless information that gets forced on us from all sides—the media, facebook, friends, acquaintances, books, magazines, etc. sometimes we’ve got to say HOLD UP and take out the trash. And I don’t know about you guys but last week was kind of a doozy from all angles!!!

We are assaulted incessantly with negativity, judgments, and all kinds of disrespect. Around every corner something is waiting to weigh us down—it’s just a part of life. Bad things happen, people rant, feelings get hurt on the daily BUT we don’t have to hold on to the negative smelly trash that gets dumped in our lap.

Some days all I do is clean out the mental garbage in my head.

You’ll never be pretty enough or skinny enough no matter what you eat or how much you work out.

There’s absolutely nothing wrong with how I look. This is who I was made to be and I’m going to keep exercising and taking care of this body. I might not look the way society thinks I should look but I don’t want to be a cookie cutter plastic Barbie doll. That’s not me.

You’re not smart enough.

I might not know everything but I can learn and if something is over my head there’s no shame in asking for help.

You can’t write another book. People are going to figure out you suck.

What does it matter if I’m not the best writer at least I’m having fun doing it. And if it doesn’t work out at least I know I tried. No regrets.

You’re a horrible person. Why did (or didn’t) you say that to so and so? Why didn’t you help them? That’s impossible. That will never work out. You can’t do this. You can’t do that….

Take all those negative nasty thoughts and crumple them up and throw them in the garbage. Because all those thoughts are just that SMELLY, USELESS, BROKEN, DIRTY TRASH!!! Sometimes those words are really heavy and you might need a friend to get them in the dumpster—that’s okay! Ask for help. Sometimes those thoughts are sticky and it takes a lot of scrubbing and scraping to get them off your skin—that’s okay! Keep scrubbing until the nasty boogers break loose and you can dump them in the can.

It’s not an easy chore to clean out our emotional baggage and negative thoughts and some days I’d rather sit and let the foul trash pile up instead of putting in the effort to clean it out but when you do you’ll feel soooo much better. And you’ll smell better too. 😉 And let’s not forget the most important thing—when you clean up and clean out it creates more space in your life for the good things. You can’t have shiny, happy, good stuff hanging out with old dingy stuff—it dulls the sparkle of its awesomeness.

Now I’ve got to go back and clean out this jam packed closet full of crap. Enough procrastinating, time to do something! 🙂

#TakeOutTheTrash #CleanOutTheBad #MakeRoomForTheGood

#TakeOutTheTrash

Fear Factor – Fight Your Fears

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Fear—one of my least favorite emotions. Fear motivates us to either take action or hide in the corner somewhere. It turns on the fight or flight response. My fears have been rising to the surface a lot lately and its most likely because come Monday I will be full swing into real life.

I’ve looked forward to 2015 for months and now it’s time to make things happen. To work my butt off and be productive. To take action!

But fear being the Debbie Downer it is keeps trying to pull me under so I thought I’d do what I do best…I’d make a list. I know right? I’m a major weirdo but it’s a way to control, organize, and attack the issues head on. So, here I sit compiling a list of my fears. I’ve come up with 12 so far—two professional and the other ten personal. (Way more fears than Tobias/Four in Divergent. I’m not that cool or that sexy. LOL!)

Here’s a glimpse some of them.

  1. I’m not author material. I don’t have what it takes to make it in the market. I don’t have the content, the skills, or the follow through to make it. And by make it I mean make enough of a living to keep the lights on.
  2. I’ll waste a year of my life reaching for crazy dreams that sound better in my fantasies than in real life.
  3. I’m wasting my life. I’m missing out on something or someone.
  4. I’ll let the people I love down.
  5. I’m deluding myself about EVERYTHING.
  6. I’ll have to survive another loss equally or (if it’s even possible) more heartbreaking than losing Chris.

I know what I would say to a friend if they posted these fears but I’m not seeking words of encouragement rather  giving you a glimpse of the crazy notions that run through my head. I can’t be the only one, right?

I’d like to tell you a poetic story that I wrote all these fears down on paper and burned them to symbolize their destruction but…

#1 I’d most likely burn myself and

#2 inadvertently set my house on fire

I’d rather not have to explain to the fire department and homeowners insurance company how I accidentally set fire to my home. Not cool. Maybe I should add burning down my house to the list?

The first step in conquering my fears is putting them in black and white–some surprised me, some didn’t but now I know. A study noted that people who wrote down their goals were 42% more likely to achieve them. I’m hoping by writing down my fears I’m upping my chances of blowing them out of the water. Even if my fears become a reality, when/if they do it won’t matter anymore. I won’t care. I will have broken free of the fear shackles. A girl can hope, right?

We’ve all got fears just like we each have the power within us to conquer them. I’m suiting up and getting ready for the first battle of many. Hopefully the FIGHT will win out over flight. 😉 #FightYourFears